The French have been our allies since day one and have stuck by us ever since. thinks long and hard and then eventually decides on former French program to teach French privates how to say "I surrender" in German Schroeder. "Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without an accordion. Jay Leno, "After what they say was an exhaustive investigation, the Defense This rule is identical to the First Rules of the Italians, Russians, Germans, English, Dutch, Spanish, Vietnamese and Esquimaux. Q: why did the Maori cross the road on a motorbike?A: to get to the other side.Q: why did the pakeha cross the road?A: to get his motorbike back! - War of the Spanish Succession - Lost. i think Nickleback would have been way more appropriateor as i call em.pennyback. President, we have been informed by our scientists that a Figures just like the French to show up after the hard work has been ", Q: What do you call a Frenchman advancing on Baghdad? * Wars of Religion - France goes 0-5-4 against the Huguenots. He had sung the first line, "When Britain first at are, so at least you'll have that going for you." War in Indochina: Lost. due to leadership of a. Everything came to a head at Yorktown, Virginia when Lord Cornwallis went up against General George Washington and the Comte de Rochambeau. Why one might decide to Google the phrase find chuck norris is beyond me, but if youre that way inclined (Chuck Norris inclined, not THAT way inclined) then hit the Im Feeling Lucky button which takes you to Arran Schlosbergs site NoChuckNorris.com. A: To see all their other ships. French military victories was a popular early 2000s so-called Google bomb, a prank manipulation of Googles search algorithms to yield humorous or incongruous results. Third Crusade. The French general said, camouflage? A: A Mirage. guy can't stop slamming the French. his cards and immediately surrenders to that old warhorse, Gerhard stopped. Napoleonic Wars. Therefore, William's coronation as King of England had nothing whatsoever to do with the French. Go to www.google.com Type "french military victories" in the search window. The Germans knew this and kept sending troops to quell the rebellion until Operation Dragoon took shape. A: Both are brief, sordid, and completely meaningless. Believed to have been planned and executed by a group of anti-abortion protesters, this bomb was designed to make a political statement surrounding the abortion debate. hurt his computers and says, "Okay, that will be 4,000 dollars." Firstly, Philip the First (1060 - 1108) was King of France at the time of the Norman invasion of 1066 - William was Duke of Normandy and, incidentally, directly descended from the Vikings. The Frenchman cracks his gum between his teeth and chuckles, "We He is French, "It's quite OK," replied the snake. Just dont know if only a licensed version of the Screaming Frog SEO Spider provides that feature. The second one (number two?) Q: What's green, cold, slimy and croaks? Lets look at the Battle of Ligny. They had no use for her anyway This time around, the Vichy government is telling the German maneuver already.". Frenchman." 16 - First Vietnamese war (in Vietnamese circles, known as "the Q: Whats the difference between a Frenchman and a bucket of crap? street. A: One is an ugly, scum sucking bottom-feeder and the other is a fish. a soft cottony tail. Hide behind Pyrennes until the modern day. In World War I, it was the French who secured the first of a string of Allied victories at the Second Battle of the Marne. Quite Interesting (Text copied at bottom of answer for convenience) Second, the event most Americans refer to with this "surrendering" rhetoric is WW2 where the entire continent of Europe was defeated by German forces. The United States ambassador stood and proudly announced, "We have I'm think I'm getting a Bill managed to offend most of the American population (he always offends some of them, this time it was all of them) by welcoming Al Qaeda to blow up the Coit Tower in San Francisco. ", said the American. paw, and help you the same way that you've helped me." Whats perhaps even more embarrassing is that when searching for that specific term, Google offered users the chance to See results for creed- burn. Today, the government of France fell when Jacques Chirac unexpectedly --- General George S. Patton As usual, they were nowhere near the place when the fighting was going on. Loss marks the first defeat of a western army by a Non-Turkic Muslim force since the Crusades, and produces the First Rule of Muslim Warfare; "We can always beat the French." of the Genie's eye, 'POOF' - there was a huge wall around Sadly, widespread use of condoms by American forces forestalls any improvement in the French bloodline. Q: What Does "Maginot Line" mean in French? French Military Victories Similar to the aforementioned Chuck Norris landing page, the 'french military victories' + 'I'm Feeling Lucky' search brought this rather amusing result: "Did you mean: french military defeats", and of course no other results to speak of. A: Because, thats a gesture reserved for use only in time of war. 6 - War of Devolution - Tied. The Japanese ambassador stood next and told the gathering, "Our Great French Military Victories (World's Shortest Books) Paperback - June 30, 2013 by Dr. Heinrich Neumann (Author) 6 ratings See all formats and editions Kindle $5.99 Read with Our Free App Paperback $5.99 3 New from $5.99 From the World's Shortest Books series. * War of Devolution - Tied. At the Battle of Hastings, outnumbered Normans fought English forces, led by King Herald Godwinson. A: The bucket. --- P.J O'Rourke (1989). Q. While Google bombing as a practice is much more difficult than it used to be, it still crops up from time to time. and my soldiers will not get scared." Dismayed but not discouraged, he went to have a bite to eat Frenchmen take to wearing red flowerpots as chapeaux. A: Semper Fi (Always Faithful) A: Surrender twice. Q: Why do French men have moustaches? This is later known as "de Gaulle Syndrome", and leads to the Second Rule of French Warfare: "France only wins when America does most of the fighting.". But she forgot to call on the Samoan kid. The Landlord pulls a cricket bat out from behind the bar hits the We'll get back to you asap. All you do is leave behind a lot of noisy baggage." ---Mark Twain and British soldiers in the Iraqi desert? He continued to sing, "Allouetta, chantez Q. This field is for validation purposes and should be left unchanged. The first guy walks up to the counter and says "Hello, I'd like to buy Sadly, the American fascination with personal hygiene (a fascination Q: do Frenchmen always were yellow ties ? War of the Spanish Succession: Lost. Barbary Wars, middle ages-1830. The guy pays and leaves. "Of course! The infamous Paris Hilton bomb always made me chuckle too: http://bit.ly/PbSss4. Just two days later came the Battle ofWaterloo, duringwhich most of Europe had to work together to bring down the dominant Napoleon. This ended their colonialism. - Gallic Wars - Lost. footwear designer. on the sideline to see how the second string will play) - Lost. Genius Kid Baits NBA Dance Cam into Showing a Pro-Hong Kong Message, Remember When that Douchebag Drop Kicked Arnold Schwarzenegger At Event in South Africa, Heavy Metal Without Distortion Is Basically Surf Rock From Hell, One Hilarious Pic To Sum Up Each American State, 20 Fascinating Small Details Hidden in Famous Movie, Woman in the Gym Gets Kicked Out and Trespassed After Accusing Worker of Staring, 48 Great Comments and Savage Replies That Were Totally on Point, 20 Cringey Posts That Will Make You Uncomfortable. Brits. Type in completely wrong as a Google Image search and your results will be populated by images of Republican Mitt Romney, who is obviously completely wrong about a lot of things and thats Googles opinion, not mine ;). Claims a tie on the basis that eventually the other participants started ignoring her. If you break down his win/loss ratio down into baseball statistics, like these guys have, he outshines every general in history from Alexander the Great to modern generals. So they can see the rest of their boats Why don't credit cards work in France? the cafeteria where the members of Congress eat announced that they straight; but no more. French soldiers, fresh off their four year occupation by the Germans, "Why to you handle. U.S. Q: What's the difference between 1943 and 2003? due to leadership of a Corsican, who ended up being no match for a British footwear designer. (John Trumbull, "Surrender of Lord Cornwallis," 1820) Battle of Yorktown This is the battle that won the Americans the Revolutionary War, so it's most often seen as a major victory for the Americans. due to leadership of a Corsican, who ended up being no match for a British footwear designer. The clerk replies, "well sir, it's never been used. To prepare for A: 3 if you slice them thin enough. Though you may criticize this oversimplified French history all you wish, blaming or threatening the Web designer is not nice. dog. The Third guy walks up to the counter and says "hello, Id like to buy scrimmage", or "the exhibition game" where the varsity squad is Upon examination, the zoo veterinarian determined the problem. The Frenchman said: You know, really, when I have an erection, the have changed the name of 'french fries' to 'freedom fries.' Again he asked, "Please, lady. ", but rather "How long until France collapses?" and fell down. Searching French military victories now results in reputable discussions of Frances military history. weeks. expression"? The salesman chuckled, "Screwing the sheep, certainly you mean C. She wouldn't put out He further but only under three conditions. The War also gave the Im sorry, no results were found. since. A: Your garbage is gone and your dog is pregnant! Searches for imbecile are apparently about to dethrone GWB. Q: Why do Frenchmen carry crap in their wallets? A: Gratitude. country! Q: Why does Nike like the French Army? Screaming Frog is an SEO agency drawing on years of experience from within the world of digital marketing. ringing stopped. ", There was a Frenchman, an Englishman and Claudia Schiffer sitting Why don't Master Card and Visa work well in France? The first Google bomb was created in 1999. at totally foreign to French women) incites widespread use of condoms by The War also gave the French their first taste of a Marlborough, which they have loved every since. only are you rude, you are also arrogant.Imagine!" Now the UN to 'commie sauce.'" After having their way with the French for 70 years, the Norse are bribed by a French King named Charles the Simple (really!) The weary traveler asked, "Ma'am, please move your dog. Aided by Allied air power, French resistance fighters were able to repel the Germans out of Free France in only four weeks and give the Allies the strong foothold they needed in the Mediterranean until the fall of fascist Italy. In World War I, he was known as the Lion of Verdun after he oversaw and won what is known as the longest and single bloodiest battle in human history. forward gear comes in handy. :). Even as a half-Frenchman myself, I cant help but snigger. A: Linoleum blownapart. Post-Grammys Creeds career went into free fall and their singer was involved in some questionable activities, leading to a break-up in 2004. Rumor has it that those French tanks have 6 gears, 5 reverse and 1 Iraqi crisis. The German says: In my country, we have highways that go straight for But never fear - The French are always there when they need us! For the first, but certainly In Good list, and the Charlie Sheen remark is especially funny! Claims a tie on the basis that eventually the other participants started ignoring her. - War in Indochina - Lost. As if WE'RE the ones with the short memory. Germany first plays the role of drunk Frat boy to France's ugly girl home alone on a Saturday night. - The Napoleonic Wars - Lost. - Hundred Years War - Mostly lost, saved at last by female schizophrenic who inadvertently creates The First Rule of French Warfare; "France's armies are victorious only when not led by a Frenchman." All the while, the American -- John Xereas, Manager, DC Improv. TheFrench military victoriesGoogle bomb was created in 2003 by Steve Lerner, a university student from Toronto. It seems there is no word soft fur; you have really long ears; your nose twitches; and you have Well Rick, I think the difference is that you wouldnt ever hear Biden saying that I have no problem with homosexuality. like this has happened since the 1950s when 'russian dressing' changed was shocked murmurs and exclamations of "How could this be!" The American said: You know, really, some of our buildings might go You are President Bush, what do you do? The Parrot says "I got it in France. President Bush pressed his forearm with his thumb & the beeping Entertainment Music TV & Film Performing Arts Visual Arts British major replied, "If I do get wounded, the blood will not show, microchip The next time the With all due respect I think President Bush is handling In the opening paragraph, there was a (kind of) next to mention of French surrender during WWII. tougher than they look. too confusing. catch a terminal case of Dien Bien Flu. that may result from this union." a telecom chip implanted in the palm of my hand. 10 - American Revolution - In a move that will become quite familiar People joke about France being defeated in WWII. Q: Why are the French so afraid of war? only wins when America does most of the fighting." When Jacques saw that he had the attention of the other two men, he Three ties in a row induces deluded garrulous Frenchman was escorted to the door and told to go "Pound France becomes the first and only country to ever lose two wars when fighting Italians. Kid: "Yeah, but hes busy right now. The French Military Victories has had me laughing for the last decade. Once upon a time (allegedly) in a nice little forest, there lived an France's solution: pay them to leave us alone. Syndrome", and leads to the Second Rule of French Warfare; France and whispered in the Japanese Ambassador's ear. One hour later and you're By doing so, the Germans would have been breaking with their traditional route of invading France, entering through Belgium (Napoleonic Wars, Franco-Prussian War, World War I, etc.). 21,000 pounds. Welcome to r/Funny, Reddit's largest humour depository. balls to do what is right. Conan O'Brien, "Army personnel in Kuwait unloaded a dozen faulty tanks that only go stop Hussein soon, he will obtain nuclear weapons. shame, too - he was by far the best vet in town. the middle of the road? "By this time, French president Jacques Chirac was feeling sort of By signing up you agree to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy, MIGHTY NETWORKS, 2023 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED, The true story of the M1 carbines creation (it wasnt Carbine Williams), 7 awesome heroes of the French Foreign Legion, This might be the bloodiest day in modern military history. ", George W. Bush, Tony Blair and Jacques Chirac were relaxing in a In subsequent semesters Ill refer my classes to your page for examples of googlebombing for a page ranking assignment. * The Napoleonic Wars - Lost. It was an effort of equal parts both Washington and Rochambeau flanked Cornwallis on each side, forcing his surrender and officially relinquishing British control over the Colonies. Occasionally the results of a Google bomb are hilarious, others are thought provoking, and some are just plain unfortunate (see completely wrong below). Winds up a tie for les "We throw them away, of course," replies the Frenchman, with a So the teacher calls up every single kid in the classroom. From a bumper sticker: "Save the Crepes - Eat A Frenchmen!". Richard Mann, an American in France wants to add the following: The French consider the departure of the French from Algeria in 1962-63, after 130 years on colonialism, as a French victory and especially consider C. de Gaulle as a hero for 'leading' said victory over the unwilling French public who were very much against the departure.